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Ladies (for the most part, but guys should read this part, too), Typically when we talk about modesty, it’s usually addressed to the females and rarely to the males. You may wonder why there is a double standard there. Stereotypically, males are very much visually orientated when it comes to sexual matters and females are more emotionally orientated. I say stereotypically, because personally I believe that there is the occasional case that would speak otherwise.
Males and Females, for the most part, are built very differently. Not just physically but hormonally, emotionally, and mentality. All these things play a role in our sexuality as well. It is said that a male will think about sex some 500 times a day! For females that number is much lower. I’m not exactly sure how someone is able to count those thoughts or who even volunteered to be counted, but it gets the point across. Men, and even boys, think about sex... a lot. We just can’t help it. I won’t get into too much detail why that is, just know it’s a physical attribute.
Unfortunately, that plays a huge role in their encounters with members of the opposite sex. See girls may think guys are stupid, but that’s only because when they are in the presence of a girl... the guys brain is definitely not thinking about math equations, scientific theories, the works of Edgar Allen Poe, or the Gettisburg Address.
So ladies, to help the guys keep their minds pure and thinking along more intelligent lines... dress modestly. It just makes the Phil 4:8 principle a lot easier to keep. What’s that principle?
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things.”
I will say... if you want a good guy to be with... dress modestly and act appropriately. If you’re dressing to “make an impression”, then you might be trying to make the wrong impression... even if the impression made is unintended. A lot of clothes might be made to accentuate or draw attention to certain features of the body... for example: short skirts, short shorts, low plunging neck-lines, shirts that show the stomach, low-riding jeans, tight fitting jeans, etc. All these are clothes that draw attention to certain features of your body, and ,thus , draw the attention of testosterone filled eyes. Even the eyes of those you may not want to draw the attention of. Older men, even though they have had longer practice at averting their eyes, still struggle with this.
“Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature.” -Romans 13:14
“What matters is not your outer appearance—the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes—but your inner disposition. Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. The holy women of old were beautiful before God that way, and were good, loyal wives to their husbands.” -1 Peter 3:3-5 (MSG)
Proverbs 31 is also a good guide of the type of women you should strive to be. Honestly, I decided in my teenage years to date women that reminded me of these passages. Thankfully, I found one in my wife and she has been a great blessing to my life.
So keep these things in mind the next time you go shopping (which I know is difficult to find decent stuff with our current culture the way it is) or go to your closet. Cute guys with good morals are hard too find anyways... it would be a shame for them to be without cute eyes as well (Matt 18:9).
Guys (ladies should read this, too!), When you look for a girl to date, what are the qualities you look for? I can tell you from examples in the Bible that certain types of women can cause more problems than you want. Samson would have been better off if he choose his wife on more than just looks and he might have even been able to keep his eyes (Judges 14:1-3, 16:4-6)! Solomon caused the whole of Israel to sin because of trying to please his wives of other faiths (1 Kings 11:4). Women can either inspire you or decimate you (just look up quarrelsome in the concordance as it appears in Proverbs).
The thing is, if you’re not looking at the inward qualities of a woman... you could end up with a headache for the better part of your life. Just as I told the ladies that if they dress a certain way to attract a guy, they may be attracting the wrong type of guy. The same goes if you go out with a girl because she looks good and flaunts it... you’re probably looking for love in all the wrong places.
The likelihood is... if she dresses like 1 Peter 3:3 says not to dress.... she probably shops a lot and will drain your life savings. She’ll not be happy otherwise. She might be what is commonly known as “High Maintenance” if she also considers herself a “Princess”. Sometimes a good woman is just as hard to find as a good man (where are all those bumperstickers, keychains, etc?).
“I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl.“ -Job 31:1
Unfortunately, if we haven’t trained our eyes to look away... our brains get overridden by something else down below and clarity of thought becomes a little more difficult. Wise choices also become difficult. Another strange scientific study for you, there was an actual study done on how well males can do math under normal circumstances compared to when they’re “turned on”. They didn’t fair so well under the influence of sexual thought as you can imagine.
Go ahead and look at the passages of how God wants women to be, and use that as your guide for who you want to date. I can promise you, you won’t be dissapointed later on in life.
-Aaron✌♥n☧ |
